NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! It’s not often I say this, but this record could actually not be more wrong. If you imagine their opening track: ‘Ready For Love’ which has a post-Queen pop edge that could be, not exactly positively compared to Scissor Sister’s then you’ve got an idea of what they’re going to sound like.

Not great.

Then you realise that it’s just been brought down a few more pegs with its smothering of crap TV show theme juice and the 80’s pop rock movement in America. This doesn’t bode well for where this record is going to go. If it weren’t for the necessity to alert others to this then I would have stopped listening at the heavy breathing and micro-waved the CD.

Although I’m not being overly harsh for the sake of it, I am truly failing to pick up on the merits of this record. The song structure is somewhat basic but modelled on old rock and roll numbers so not unforgivable. There’s plenty of huge tracks on the radio at the moment that cling to old song structure modes so why shouldn’t Purple Melon?

Purple melon…………………..(head shake).

The general playing ability on the instruments is not impressive and the vocals have been multi tracked in a desperate bid to mask the weak whine. The guitarists have obviously worked a load of guitar riffs and technically can hit the notes, but I’m not believing the emotion behind it.

When things were looking bleak, disaster struck and ’Henry’s Rocket’ started. Seriously, the last thing I wanted was a piano ballad. I could see what they were trying to do, I think; imitate a Yes style ballad breakdown but if Wakeman’s not in your band, don’t attempt prog ballads. It’s a simple fact. What you’re left with is a weak effort that sounds more like a Bond theme, written for a musical, played bad. If you understand what I mean try listening to the next track: ‘Don’t Give Up’. What gets me the most is these guys are all younger than me!

I’m sorry to write like this, I truly am. I want all music to be appreciated in it’s own right and I’m sure out there, there is a huge undiscovered market for this genre of music, but it is not for me. And in all honesty, I can’t really think of anyone who would. But then people do keep buying U2 records, so fair play. There is a mention of them working with Paul Stacey (Black Crowes/Oasis) online, so perhaps he sees something in them I have unfortunately missed. Maybe live they really rock, who knows. Good luck Purple Melon, I’m sorry but I did not like this at all.

Check them out at:

http://www.myspace.com/purplemelonspace