The Wet Secrets – Rock Fantasy

Rodeo Peanut Records

May 23, 2008, 03:58 PM

The Canadian band The Wet Secrets are out with their first album, "Rock Fantasy". From what I can gather it’s their first album so they’re hopefully out to impress. Unfortunately "Rock Fantasy" won’t get them very far. I’m struggling to find anything good about it.

As soon as I started to listen to their first song, it screamed out Eagles of Death Metal rip off; the rhythm of the drums and the robotic tuning on Lyle Bell’s vocals sound just the same. This band seems to like the robotic auto tuning as they seem to have it throughout this album. Maybe they like the effect it gives to songs or they’re covering Bell’s bad singing ability. Who knows?

‘Get Your Own Apartment’ and ‘Easy Prey Vs Sex Maniac’ have a very similar drum rhythm and with both of the songs being the first two on the album it starts off badly. ‘Grow Your Own Fucking Moustache, Asshole’ isn’t any better; the only good thing about this track is during the verses the trumpet by Kim Rackel gives a Jamaican feel. This gives the listeners a break from hearing Eagles of Death Metal for a while. For how much longer? I’ll just have to see if the songs get any better.

As I’ve been listening to the album I’ve been thinking there is a guitar rhythm in most songs but I’ve found out that none of the members play any guitar. I am impressed with the bass sounding like guitars and it does give a change to the instrument line up within the band. Claps are incorporated in track seven ‘Boat Gas Death Train’ which I do like and the only thing I like in this song.

‘Hep A Birthday’ couldn’t be a nicer song(!) ‘We hope you get cancer. Hope you get cancer and die’ is some of the lyrics from this song. Fun element? Maybe. Some listeners will find it funny, others might not.

Apart from the odd impressive ideas they have in a couple of songs, there isn’t much to this band at all considering this is their first album. "Rock Fantasy" doesn’t offer anything new to the music scene and it gets a bit boring after awhile. It won’t be a surprise if people turn this off before they reach the final track. They have the idea there, no guitars and mostly wind instruments, but they’re not going about it the right way. I think if they find it then they will get somewhere.